Once upon a time Patty and March were perfume virgins. We just didn’t know how to do it. Where to start, you know? The ladies tried to fix us up with Lancome, and they tried to set us up with Estee, but it didn’t work out. March’s best friend loved Cristalle, but Cristalle hated her, so that never went anywhere. We made some mistakes. Flirted with Paris and Giorgio, but nothing much happened. You get the picture.

It’s funny looking back on those days and realizing how naive we were. Now we’ve turned pro. We’ve been caressed by Guerlain, wooed by Malle, bitch-slapped several times by Caron. Serge has suggested things that would have disgusted us not so long ago, and now we just sigh and say, oooooooooooohhhh. That’s a new one.

Perfume 101

We’ll leave this one up with a permanent link, and dump in here the relevant section from a previous post on where to get samples, so if you read this intro before, just skip ahead to the new stuff, here goes:

Unless you’re richer than God, the easiest way to sample a lot of fragrances is to buy or swap samples, not full bottles. But where?

When we first wrote this in Spring 2006, eBay was a great place to start: eBay had samples of rare, discontinued, vintage or non-export fragrances that you probably weren’t going to find anywhere else. But they kicked all the decanters off in Summer 2007, so you have to look around more. Four of the biggest eBay sellers including yours truly Patty got together and opened a website, The Perfumed Court, featuring tons of samples. There are many other sellers as well, check the link on the left for Sample and Decant Sellers. We haven’t run into a decant or sample seller yet that wasn’t a complete perfume nut and good on customer service, though we suppose there are some out there just by law of averages.
Department stores and getting samples there can be difficult, but usually if you buy something or cultivate one of the SAs, it works best.

You can buy samples from a number of online niche perfume stores like Perfume Shoppe, B-glowing, Aedes, Lacremebeauty, or Luckyscent, for nominal amounts of money; some of the niche perfumers also have their own sample programs.

MUA, Basenotes and Perfume of Life have a section for swapping and active perfume talk forums. If you have have a bottle or two of something decent and don’t mind the details associated with swapping — decanting and wrapping and mailing and keeping track — that is an excellent way to sample many scents for just the cost of postage and some decanting supplies. You’ll also learn a lot by reading and interacting in any one or more of those forums.

Where to start? Just start anywhere. Pick something you’ve read about. Or sample your way through a particular line, if you’ve found one scent there that really appeals. Or pick a note you like (rose, incense, tobacco, whatever.)

We don’t want to frighten the horses, so this is where we think you should start in your sniffage to decide what you like and what direction you might like to explore further. With a couple of noted exceptions, we find these fragrances worthwhile without being scarily challenging to the nosebuds. Is this a biased list, weighted toward niche product and reflecting scents we like and neglecting things we don’t? Well, sure. So what?

You Should Smell:

• Classics you might not have smelled before, because this is what 100% high-octane gorgeousness smells like – Chanel Bois de Iles, Caron Parfum Sacre or Nuits de Noel, Patou Joy.
• Leather, because leather is such a great non-sweet note that adds depth to fragrance – Chanel Cuir de Russie, Serge Lutens Daim Blond, Caron Tabac Blond, CB I Hate Perfumes Russian Leather.
• Incense, for the same reason – L’Artisan Passage d’Enfer or CdG Avignon
• Citrus — Guerlain Fleurs de Cedrat or Vitalisant, Carthusia Mediterraneo, Santa Maria Novella Eva.
• Musk — Serge Lutens Clair de Musc, Narciso Rodriguez for Her, SJP Lovely
• Tea — one of the Bvlgaris (Verte — the one that launched a thousand imitations, Blanc, Rouge) L’Artisan The Pour Une Ete
• Amber — Hermes Hermessences Ambre Narguile (P – Yes, it’s the Nazgul, but if you are going to find out if you love amber, go with one of the best ones out there, and this is it), Youth Dew Amber Nude

Florals with an emphasis on a single note, to see if that is a flower you’re digging:

• Orange – L’Artisan Fleur d’Oranger (P – no sense playing around with this, the L’Artisan is the best one available, so then you can measure all others against it) or Serge Lutens Fleurs d’Oranger (advanced beginner, due to cumin)
• Iris — tricky for beginners due to metallic strangeness. Less challenging scents: Acqua di Parma Iris Nobile, Hermes Hiris (advanced beginner)
• Rose – one of the Rosines, Creed Fleur de The Rose Bulgare
• Violet — Laura Tonatto E. Duse, Guerlain Meteorites (dirt cheap and cheerful!), Annick Goutal Violette, or Molinard Violette if you have a high sugar tolerance
• White florals — Serge Lutens Un Lys or Datura Noir, Malle’s Lys Mediterranee, Piguet’s Fracas, Marc Jacobs or Marc Jacobs Blush (very accessible, inexpensive and beautiful)

Others:

• Chypre, for that weird, mossy groove with its iterations – Coco Mademoiselle, Guerlain Mitsouko (warning — advanced beginner, try hard, it’s like your first bite of asparagus), Guerlain Sous le Vent because it is The Bomb (Yes, it’s new and hard to get and all that, but this is a chypre that is complex but with great, broad appeal), Hermes 24, Faubourg or Patou 1000
• “Virtual Reality” frags that take you on a journey through a series of notes – Malle En Passant, L’Artisan Tea for Two, many of CB I Hate Perfumes (Russian Caravan Tea, Black March, Mr. Hulot’s Holiday, Burning Leaves, In The Library… check their website and salivate)
• Smell Because We Said So — they’re beautiful, unusual, and your life will be richer: Annick Goutal (Hadrien, Folavril, Passion, Petite Cherie, Mandragore, knock yourself out), Guerlain Apres L’Ondee, Bond No. 9 Chinatown (nothing else smells quite like it), Ormonde Jayne Woman (that OJ base! sigh), Donna Karan Cashmere, Gucci by Gucci EDP
• A Masculine, because we don’t believe in “men’s scents” – L’Instant Pour Homme, Arpege Pour Homme, Hermes Bel Ami, Rosine Rose Pour Homme, Guerlain Derby, Givenchy Pi
• If You Like Things Really Sweet: Flowerbomb, Caron Narcisse Noir, Guerlain L’Heure Bleue, Molinard Tendre Friandise

But mostly, remember that, like Barbies, There are No Rules in Perfume. You like what you like, you don’t have to explain it by dissecting the notes and comparing and contrasting the composition, or you can do that if that puts bubbles in your bathtub. Perfume is personal and for fun. It makes us remember and sigh and swoon and turn up our nose. How we react to a perfume is unique, individual and unpredictable. So if you don’t love that 50-year-old classic and think it smells like the backside of a frog, please don’t be shy saying so. If you adore Brittney’s or Paris’ newest creation, don’t hide it! Stress is for work, tests and teenager raising, not for perfume.

Patty

I´ve been sniffing my samples of Guerlain´s new releases, Sous Le Vent and Plus Que Jamais, from Patty (thanks, P!)

As I expected, I loved one and thought the other was just okay.

In one of life’s little surprises, I got the order wrong, however.

Sous le Vent has been described as à¢â‚¬Å“dry,à¢â‚¬? à¢â‚¬Å“herbalà¢â‚¬? and à¢â‚¬Å“green,à¢â‚¬? words that ring my warning bells. Green frequently means vetiver, which smells awful on me, or some other note that basically smells like (sorry) urine. Green can also be too bitter à¢â‚¬” the in-your-face pugnacity of Balmain Vent Vert, or the greens, galbanum and clary sage in Ma Griffe that send me screaming out the door.

So I was hoping, at best, to tolerate Sous le Vent (which translates as leeward or upwind, according to my French dictionary.) Instead, I adore it. I´m going to crib here from the estimable Octavian on 1000 Fragrances, who explains the scent so beautifully:

à¢â‚¬Å“Sous le Vent was named after some islands around Reunion, the source of beautiful ylang-ylang and vanilla essences used in all Guerlain fragrances. This chypre is rather austere and dry with vanilla and amber without beeing sweet, sticky or creamy. It has some exquisite powderiness (not the cosmetic one) but that suggested by a delicate granulated sand. It has some Amber83 and a little indolic nuance.à¢â‚¬?

Let me go out on a limb here and say it reminds me a bit of Djedi à¢â‚¬” it is clearly a first cousin, with a dollop of Djedi´s haunting spice note but without Djedi´s supreme strangeness. (For one thing, it doesn´t remind me of meat stew with cardamom.) It is spicy/sweet chypre rather than green, and it is strong but not overly assertive. Yes, it is dry, but dry like the high desert of New Mexico in June rather than the surface of Mars. It doesn´t remind me of any of the rest of the Guerlains, except at its base. Because waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy down there at the bottom, after you´ve danced the fandango with the vanilla and amber and the floral notes, that “indolic nuance” is lurking there, waiting to pinch your fanny. This thing? Is pure heaven.

The Plus Que Jamais à¢â‚¬¦ I am not going to rag on, because, objectively, it is gorgeous. I wrote a small review earlier but ultimately I felt I needed a bigger sample I could really soak myself with in order to make an informed decision. Well, I´ve been soaking, and my decision is à¢â‚¬¦ this is a Guerlain perfect for those people (like Patty) who aren´t huge Guerlain Whores in the first place.

Remember, PQJ is the scent humorist Gene Weingarten flipped over as he was searching for a fragrance for his wife that didn´t make him think of, as he put it, “streetwalking skanks.” So. The closest comparison I can make is Apres L’Ondee without its floral sweetness, and with a much richer creaminess, and that is high praise. PQJ is tasteful in the extreme, elegant without aloofness, a very expensive-smelling skin scent that is the sort of thing you’d be wanting to wear to bed with your sweetie. It could be described with words like creamy, delicately musky, gentle, polished, expensive, silky, smooth à¢â‚¬¦ you get the picture. It is a sublime, unadorned composition. It is the most expensive cashmere you can buy.

But à¢â‚¬” here´s the rub à¢â‚¬” I don´t buy my Guerlain for subtle, expensive simplicity. Give me the baroque strangeness of Mitsouko and Vol de Nuit, the animalic fug of Jicky, the bite-my-ass bouquet of Chamade, the floriental sucker-punch of L´Heure Bleue, the sultry, shocking rose of Nahema, the à¢â‚¬¦ I could go on and on, you get the idea. Who the hell wants a subtle Guerlain? Well, Gene Weingarten did, and maybe you do too. Patty thinks it is breathtaking, supporting my theory. If you have been trying (and failing) to find a Guerlain to love with, this one’s for you.

So don´t let me stop you from buying that tasteful cashmere. But I´ll stick with the Pucci print shift, the leather shorts and and the fishnet stockings, thanks.

Reunion Island volcano, anytravels.com

Elodina perdita miskin, ento.csiro.au

March

Perfume.com is offering a 10% discount to all PPPP readers. Just click on the link on the left. It’s good any time, no minimum value, no limit on uses.  Use the code PERFUMEPOSSE at checkout to get your 10% off. 

Patty

On our way to the orthodontist’s today, my 16-year-old son, Harry, and I stopped in at the grocery store to get some lunch and pick up some sandwich fixins.  Quick visit to the deodorant since we were both out, meandered around the end, and stumbled into the Axe display, and it had something on it called snake peel?  Well, we finally figured out that’s the new name for their new shower gel, snake peel.  Whatever.  We had a couple of minutes there where we thought that was the new name of one of their scents.  ‘Tis a shame it wasn’t.

 As I was meandering off, Harry picked up the Axe Unlimited and hit me on the back with an Axe spritz. You know, like Axe was a weapon of some sort. As we walked over to the deli, me with my Axe wound on my back, I realized how true that is.

 From the Axe Effect website – “When you wear your favorite scent of Axe shower gel, body spray, anti-perspirant or deodorant on any of your male hot zones (a.k.a. your body), your new and improved male musk is released into the atmosphere, quickly reaching nearby females. This is exciting, as quasi-scientific research has proven women like men who smell good.”

Based on my quasi-scientific nose, having to wear that crap on my back for the better part of the day, I do agree that women like men who smell good, but this isn’t one of those things that I would classify as smelling good in a way that would be improving the male musk or the feminine ardor.  My oldest son bought the hype of this stuff and wore Axe for a while.  Seems like a lot of young men have.  You know, a good personality, sense of humor and a dash of Hermes Bel Ami would work so much better.  Review summary:  Should be used only when you’ve been sweating all day, can’t get into a shower and need emergency smell care for the ten minutes it will take you to get home and wash that crap off  never.

 Marie Antoinette, the new movie from Sofia Coppola, is getting panned in France.  TomKat may be on the rocks. Woo-hoo!!  Free Katie!!!

Well, my wintertime reality fare is dunzo – The Amazing Race, Survivor, American Idol.  I really had warmed up to Katherine by the end, no matter how boring I thought she was.  Much as I love Taylor, I just can’t see him being an “American Idol.”  He’s fun and cute and has a very winning personality and some mad singing skills, but idol?  Um, no.

What I’m really looking forward to is All-Star Big Brother 7 starting July 6, and we (yes, I’m counting you, even if you don’t watch it, to help me vote to get my faves in) get to vote for six of the guests to come back from past seasons starting June 21. Now, I’m not just a normal fan of this show, and I really hate myself for loving it as much as I do. Yes, I’m one of those that watches the 24/7 live feeds off and on (just when the recaps sound like it’s getting interesting). Ever have one of those things you do that you feel not just a little pervy about, but you do it anyway because it’s just too much fun?  Yeah, but I can keep my clothes on for this.   So if you’re looking for good recapping or BB sites to follow the fun on, try these:

• Joker’s Updates
• TV Clubhouse
• James Rhine Big Brother 7
• The always excellent TVGasm, where even if you don’t watch these shows, the recap will make you laugh

Now, is this show trashy?  You betch, and I love me some trash.

And this is kind of fun, shows you the most recent searches on the internet.  Little scary too in just how pedestrian most searches are.

Am I the last person on the face of the earth to discover Grey’s Anatomy?  What a great show. I hate Dr. McDreamy. Guy pursues girl when he is not even divorced, then keeps longing for her.  Cute, but a creep, the kind of guy you definitely don’t want your daughter ever running into.  George, on the other hand is seriously hot, but this hairdo?  No, no, no, you can never get your hair cut like that again.  That is hideous and still sorta hot in a more kinky way.

Can we talk about Lost just briefly?  I know I really shouldn’t be watching this show off and on and then watch the finale, but WTF?  The Pearl hatch was studying the other hatch, but it turns out the Pearl hatch was really the fake hatch, and then it blew up via magnetic kaboom, except maybe it didn’t and what is up with Libby? Is she behind all of this?

And go look at this page and tell me the results aren’t rigged. Clay Aiken is the top search on E! Online, and Elliott Yamin has 78% of the vote in the “Which American Idol runner-up’s album would you buy.”  Elliott had some pipes, at least for the 10 seconds I stayed awake and listened when he came on.  Yawn.  Clay Aiken?!?!? And what was with his hair on Wednesday?  Dis-as-ter. 

 Perfume? Oh, yeah, sorry!   Comment here and let me know you’d like to be in the drawing for a sample of Plus que Jamais and Sous le Vent. I’ll have my dog, Buddy, help me get a winner from the entries and announce the winner next week sometime, probably Wednesday!

Patty

Hi!

 Criminy, my mind is going, I totally forgot about a post for today.  Finals for youngest son this week, getting electrician out here and sprinkler guy and orthodontist appointment, somehow I slipped a cog and a post for today.

 So… I decided to sniff something March gave me that I’m trying to figure out why she didn’t wrap in hazardous waste wrappings inside of an airtight tube.  Annick Goutal Fier. 

During the summer in Kansas, there’s a lot of construction work on the roads and a lot of oil wells, especially in Ellis County.  Why my parents failed to buy their farm in Ellis County, with a big pool of oil under it just irritates me still. I really always wanted to be filthy stinking oil rich.  They drilled for oil like four times on our farm and came up dry each time, and I always cried when my parents broke the news. They drilled one last time after we sold the farm, while we still retained the oil and gas rights for ten years… nada, dry hole, bupkus.  Anyway…we’d drive down those two-lane highways in the summer, no AC in the car, with the windows down, and get stopped by the flagman, waiting for the lead car to finish pulling the other lane through what was now a one-lane highway where we had to take turns driving down it.  As we started down that one lane, with the windows down, 100 degrees, freshly laid asphalt and tar on the road, with the oil wells pumping on either side, that’s exactly the smell of Annick Goutal Fier.  No fruity happiness shows up later to save it or me from pronouncing it a total scrubber.  So unless this has hundred dollar bills under the cap, which is what the smell of oil and tar should have, it is definitely not for me.

 And since I am so unprepared and late, and while I hate to ever do business on the blog, I do want to offer this to anyone who is a reader. If you ever are wanting a decant of something I sell on eBay, don’t order it from there, just let me know via the Contact Us button on the left hand side, and I’ll give you a 10% discount on all orders any time.  Again, I can only do that if you do NOT order it through eBay. *cringe* end of businessy thing.

Patty