Hair Products I Love

Once upon a time, there was a girl who had beautiful, shiny, bouncy hair. It was a wonderful shade of honey blonde. Thick and luxurious, it looked good short or long. Then she had children. Something happened to her beautiful hair. It got some gray in it, and those gray hairs weren’t shiny and pretty at all, or bouncy. They were tough and wiry and dry and oogy.

The Mommy-with-the-now-gray-strands had an idea!! She went to the nice lady at the beauty shop and asked her to please give her some shimmery golden highlights for her hair that would cover up that icky gray hair, and she did! How pretty and blond her hair is, but, ohmy, it is a little dry, isn’t it? Well, it is either the gray or the dry, so dry it is.

And the Nice Lady got older, and her children turned into teenagers, and her hair got dryer as she fried — er, colored her hair and permed it and pulled it out when the teenagers started driving.

Alas, one day she looked in the mirror and decided something had to change– her hair hung there like a mop, it wasn’t shiny or pretty, it was dull and lifeless with dry, split ends. There must be a way to get back her beautiful tresses. She thought and she thought and she googled until she found the answer… Kerastase in the pretty pink bottle! Yes, this might work, so she pulled out the battered credit card and ordered the shampoo and the hair masque and the conditioner. Then she watched out the window until the man in the blue uniform delivered her packages with the magic elixir hair products.

She shampooed and conditioned and slowly but surely over a few weeks, her hair started being soft again and shiny, but not as much as it could be and not so bouncy. Then she found the Chi flat iron, which was very, very spendy, but her hair was shinier and softer after using it, too. Then just a drop of Chi Silk Infusion right out of the shower just made it silkier and shinier, but it needed something else, something she had been lusting after for months…

the thing that was supposed to not damage your hair at all when it was drying, the thing that was was supposed to leave hair even shinier after drying, the thing that could leap damaged hair in a single bound and stop lifeless locks with a puff of air. It was all silver slickness and even spendier than the flat iron, but she finally gave in during a moment of weakness and ordered it (eBay, natch, way less than Sephora). The T3 Tourmaline Evolution!!!

It showed up on its UPS Carriage, and she took it and all of her other shampoos and conditioners and infusions and flatirons, closed herself in the bathroom to see if she could recreate the hair of her youth with all these great new hair products.

20 Minutes later (ionic dryers are super-fast!) she at last had swingy, bouncy, shiny hair, full of lovely golden highlights.

The moral of this story? If you spend enough on hair products, your hair doesn’t have to turn into Old Lady Hair.Is it worth it? Probably not, but, damn, my hair looks good!