Paco Rabanne 1 million:
From your ad I would’ve thought
You’re butch and young and streamlined,
But you’re more the zaftig sort.
I don’t like Aedes de Venustas Eau de Parfum
that much. You probably don’t agree
But it strikes me as a dank incense
and leaves me shiveringly.
Amouage Homage.
Those round French vowels, so very nice.
But you’re one not yet tested:
Too much rose and too much price.
Chanel Beige takes to the stage
And I know what my problem is -
It’s chic and cut-glass, a class pain-in-the-arse
And I just don’t get that biz.
Dior Homme Sport is unrelated
To its sibling Dior Homme
The latter’s iris is replaced
by a citrus rom-pom-pom.
El Attarine – a luminescent dream
Is how you started out.
But now the more I sniff you,
Dirty musk is all you shout.
Gaiac 10 may be too slight
To command quite all that trouble
To obtain it. But if more available,
I’d get it at the double.
Gucci by Gucci pour Homme:
Sniffed and not outstanding.
But James Franco – hubba hubba!
A fine choice in their branding.
Kenzo Power
Power of flower.
Bottle lovely.
Juice nearly a wower.
Oh Duchaufour! what’s happening?
You’ve gone all weird aquatic,
With Mag Romana and Fleur de Liane
I’m seriously unerotic.
Tom Ford White Patchouli:
The pornmeister likes his oxymoron.
And who’d've thunk that this bland pap
Is where he stopped getting his whore on?
My excuse? A lousy cold that started mild and has had me in bed for three days straight. And it’s not even pleasant company. Please, do better below.
White Patch was snoozy huh? I haven’t tried the Venusta yet, but your assessment was what I was afraid of…And I have to agree on the Chanel Beige (chic and cut glass for sure)-I can admire it but its not for me….
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
Thanks HV. I think you and I have reasonably similar taste…
Aedes has wowed me in service and speed,
So I ordered their scent with much hope,
But Venustas on me, smells like a thin reed
excommunicated by a smokey ol’ Pope.
Elena’s Mousson surprised me with melon
that came out of nowhere and bloomed
His Vanilla Galante, may it be a pure helion,
From this aesthete I need a good swoon.
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 12:57 pm
I’m sorry you are disappointed
With both of the juices described;
Here’s hoping for sure
That this year offers more
Of the scents that your doc would prescribe.
dirty musk (head pokes up like one of those desert animals)?
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Oh, yes. Quite worthy of the meerkat impression.
Oh Lee, you made my morning so much better
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
Always a pleasure!
Ah, Lee, thanks for the Poetry in the Morning
Too busy chasing truant students to create anything, but I hope your cold is chases completely away right quick
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
Thanks doll!
Can I have some of whatever that cold medicine is?
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
Dear Lee,
Some things in your poetry make me feel a bit sad.
Since when are chic and cut-glass so terribly bad?
And Homage, dear boy, is more than just nice.
It’s an astonishing rose, beyond any price.
Still, I hope that you will feel better quite fast,
And that you poor aching head will clear at long last.
Until then, sweet dreams of James Franco,
And for your quick wit, as always, I thank you.
helenviolette Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 11:54 am
“James Franco…I thank you”- well done!
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:10 pm
I’m sorry that I near-upset you:
I really did mean little harm
It’s just that a week being housebound
Brings me close to the funny ole farm
For your thanks I send love in return
And a snuggly wuggly hug.
And now, my dear, pass me a tissue
To serve, for my nose, as a plug.
Dear man- you’re exhausted,
More than I’d divined;
Some newer releases you’ve broadly maligned…
Alas, I can’t fault you-
Those prices- you see ‘em-
Seem far more well-suited to a fine museum !
Homage is quite lovely; I’ve sniffed it- but, Jesus !
In order to buy it, you’d have to be Croesus .
I know I’m remiss in my communication-
Consumed with the troubles of family and nation.
But still- I adore you !
That fact never changes-
Despite all my madness, which swiftly deranges.
Forgive me, my darling
For prattle demented-
In our friendship and mania
I am contented.
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:15 pm
You need no forgiving,
For truly it’s known
That even in madness
and sadness
and badness
You keep people living
And my heart is your own.
Kathryn Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Re my homage to Homage:
Didn’t mean to say that I could afford it,
Just, quite simply, I truly adored it.
Oh, I’d love to get my Dickinson on (who else does modern quatrains? I’m coming up oddly blank…) , but I’m at work. So I will just say I enjoyed this immensely and agree with you on almost everything. Except Power maybe. Didn’t do it for me, though good bottle, I agree. Haven’t tried the LeLabo.
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
Oh, it didn’t do it much for me either though I can see the appeal. Keep on workin’!
Preach it, reverend! Hallelujah, I’m with you brother
And you nailed it re the Aedes. I thought I was the only nonbeliever.
I’m feeling a bit opportunistic, knowing that my merriment is only at the expense of your good health but really sir, having a cold has good effect on your humor. I do hope you feel better soon anyway
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Oh, I’m lots better today. I actively dislike the Aedes number, unfortunately. When’s Duchaufour’s number for luckyscent expected? I thought it was due out by now….
March Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
Oh, it’s there. You hadn’t heard? It’s called Grandmere Fatale, I think. Notes of old bath water, dusty potpourri and unwashed socks. Has Duchaufour written all over it.
You brightened up my morning! What a treat.
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:19 pm
It’s my pleasure, Linda.
Feel better, dear Lee!
I love your little poems. Just a reminder that 2008 was not a good year for new fragrances, at least in my humble opinion. But, oh…I think 2009 will be much, much better.
Hugs!
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Oh fingers crossed… I need some scented inspiration.
This, for Lee, who’s a bit ailin’
From Musette, his favorite
2008 – in a nutshell:
Big ‘meh’ on mostly new releases
Except for Drama Nuui
I took one sniff and it was bliss
My mind, it went ka-blooey!
And then La Liz, of Zornish fame,
she stole my heart away
with Violets all soaked with Rain
Evoking a Spring Day
My soul was stolen by the Classics
Mitsy, Ondee and Femme
Add Dior vintage and Vacances
for enduring love, not whim
My senses and internal organs
Both physical and evanescent
Delighted in these scented gifts
They’re all such lovely presents!
So there you have it, my saturation
in scent delight is deep
Of all delights, though, Posse is
The One I hope to keep!
Lee Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Musette, with the power of your rhymin’
(Which, by the way, needs no refinin’)
You’ve sent me ashiver
With a delicious scent quiver:
And your advances I won’t be declinin’.
I think that I shall never snort
A ‘fume so dull as Dior Homme Sport.
Perhaps, though Gucci emulates,
Their scent my nose neither likes nor hates.
Oh, this was such a treat!!! Thank you so much!!! I keep trying to do perfume reviews with haikus but nothing emerges. Just like what happens with some perfumes.
PS That Aedes did NOTHING for me. But I’d do something naughty for a bottle o’Beige!
Musette Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Too many words come
to March for her to stick to
Just.Five.Syllables
xo
Shelley Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 2:32 pm
behold loud scent tamed
on perfumista temptress
wears smack-red lips now
March Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
Two loving friends mock
my inability to
get to the damn point.
March Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
PS
I had to look up
just how many syllables
I need. Shame on me.
Shelley Reply:
January 9th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
Louise Reply:
January 10th, 2009 at 11:32 am
What damn point
?
a-herm:
2008 was not great
but some juice was quite pretty
Poivre 23 gets top marks
in this fanciful ditty
I was also amused
by the Comme de Garcons
violet space rocks a courtesy
of that hatter Mr. Jones
Another delight
was Amouage Jubilation
but I find in hindsight
she’s from 2007
less tempting to me
was Tom Ford’s white patchoulie
I’d rather be wearin
Britney’s fragrant tomfoolery
Warm woods for women
sprouted the malls
such a pleasant repreive
from the fruity flor-als
Lee, these are great! I’m not feeling quite creative (and also, should be working) so you won’t be getting much from me except condolences on the illness.
Something’s been going around by us too. Both the S.O. and I have been feeling off since Sunday. Hooray flu!
Hope we’re both feeling better in no time. Unicorns and rainbows til then.
Also, clearly I need to lay off the Nyquil a bit, eh.
I’m with you on James Franco, could it be that G by G pour homme is the perfume equivalent of Pineapple Express, (dull and uninteresting), but he’s so lovable in it…
Lee, thank you for that. Makes me feel so much better for not having had the chance to try any of those yet.
as a member of the rhyming impaired, let me say………….
i remain agog at the talent displayed herein.
BWAHAHA! – I’ll have what you’re having!
Quite a raft of poets have come out of the woodwork, I am impressed!
I walked into Saks one fine day
To try some Armani Prive’
But I was so disappointed,
I became double-jointed
So quickly did I turn away.
Musette Reply:
January 10th, 2009 at 9:30 am
Yay!