Petard (I wuz Hoist)

Well!  It’s Official:  I. Am. A. Snob.

Oh, I know – you’re all thinking “Musette?  A snob!?  Why, she’s a Woman of the People, a Regular Jo,  etc etc“…. and you’d be right!

You’d also be just a teeeeeny bit wrong.

I am, in general, pretty loosey-goose about my place in the world, having had the foolishness beat out of me by Life lo, these umpteen years full of all the slings and arrows, etc….. but errrry now and then, I am reminded just how …smug(?  yeah.  smug) I can be – especially about perfume.   Yes, yes….we all know how much I love the spendies like Amouage Tribute (and BELOVED!  Oh, my days – how I love Beloved) and the lesser-knowns (at least amongst the hoi-polloi (insert snob-snicker) like the early Les Exclusifs and my vaunted Doblis…yeah, yeah, yeah…. but!  I also pride myself on loving certain brands lauded by Drugstore Cowgirls – except they have the cachet of being vintages from yonks ago (Coty L’Origan!  L’Aimant!  Sand & Sable! Tuvache Jungle Gardenia!).  I rocked the stones out of some vintage Heaven Sent the other day, swanning around with my ironic self (honestly, I’m way too old for irony – it’s not a good look on my wrinkled face)… I even took a great deal of pleasure in testing a couple of the early Jessica Simpsons because omg!  The Perfumistas were going apeshit over them and, well, I had to find out what the fuss was all about, didn’t I?  (spoiler:  I didn’t love them – but not because they were Jessica Simpson (who IS Jessica Simpson, btw?  I remember a lot of blonde hair and teeth – but don’t recall anything else about her)

…but now?  Well.  I am gobsmacked – and  a little bit terrified (more about that in a minute*).  Here’s what happened:  So, on Friday I had to dash down to UPS to drop off my busted laptop (PSA:  ALWAYS get the extended warranty).  The young lady who came out of the back to take my package smelled…. well, she smelled DELIGHTFUL!!!  Like Clinique Happy on a sunny, Spring day!  So I said (smirking inside because I KNEW WHAT SHE WAS WEARING BECAUSE MUSETTE KNOWS!!!) ” gosh, you smell great!  You’re wearing Clinique Happy!  Right?”

Wrong.

She smiled, said ‘thank you!  But it’s…  Victoria’s Secret Love.  And I love it because I’m wearing the body spray which is a whole lot lighter!”

Blessed be, she was busy trying to get my receipt printed out so didn’t see the rictus of ‘wtf?’ on my foolish face.  I would’ve been less shocked if The Girl had started talking to me!  I thanked her and beat a hasty retreat – because I had a lot to think about.  OMGosh.  SO. MUCH. THINKING.

  1. Why was I so shocked?  I’ve never smelled a Victoria’s Secret scent so how am I to know what they smell like?  Why shouldn’t/couldn’t one (or more) be halfway decent – or even Very Good?  Or…GREAT?
  2. Was part of my shock the idea of a body spray (which I always equate with Axe (or its Severely Evil Twin, Bod, which my 90yr old father wore (in lieu of a shower) and the combo was LETHAL).  I mean, I wear Jean Nate’ in Summer and the only difference between that and a body spray is the application!  No5 body lotion isn’t much more than (an absolutely fabulous) emulsified liquid……right?  why am I recoiling at this notion?
  3.  Since when did I become such a Smugmuffin?  Omg.  I think I’ve always been smug – and have just glossed over it with an extremely thin veneer of reverse snobbery (Jean Nate’, thrift store ‘finds’ and loving handbags that cost a petard but do not showcase a logo, that sort of thing)…..
  4.  How the HELL am I going to find that stupid body spray?  A quick trip over to Fragrantica shows about elebenty-zillion fragrance-related items with the word ‘Love’ in their name.  *(this is the ‘terrifying’ part).  I don’t think I haz it in me, y’all.  That’s a whole lotta Love to wade through!

So.  I’ve confessed to being smug about Victoria’s Secret (though I used to love a cotton panty they had called Hi-Cut Rio.  Alas, they no longer make them and my body no longer ……well, you know…. eh, nebber mind).   What are YOU smug about?  Perfume lines?  Chocolate? Coffee? Shoes? Toilet paper? (don’t laugh!  I have a friend who is a TOTAL TP snob!)  Let me and The Girl know – we’re nearly done packing/mailing out Christmas in a Day winners so Herself is itching to throw a pawnail onto randomDOt again.  We’ll pull a few goodies from the Messy Armoire to send to a lucky commenter!

 

Have any of you smelled any of the Victoria’s Secret scents?  Thoughts?

  • Angelique says:

    Ink pens. shame faced A regular stick ballpoint pen causes me to smirk/snarl.
    Gimme my flowing gel pen!

  • Kathleen says:

    How I love to read your posts Musette! Your sense of humor tickles me, and your thought process thought provoking! I’m not really a snob about anything, I only try to buy the best that I can with my budget. I love higher-end makeup though. VS has some lovely perfumes, I used to wear Heaven back in the day, and recently purchased the current formulation. I sniffed love on a rare stop at VS store, it’s really good! I encourage you to stop in a VS store at some point. No comparison to Chanel, but surprisingly good (albeit many too sweet) perfumes and body sprays/oils. Kiss The Girl from me! xx

  • Gina T. says:

    I’m not a big fan of the VS stuff. I am a poetry snob, a book/literature snob, a grammar snob, (yes) a toilet paper over NEVER under snob, a foodie snob and so much more. We all think we have the answers or know the right/best way in some things. I wish I had more grace but I am a sassy bitch who is always willing to change and learn. But, it DOES take three days to make a proper homemade lasagna. LOL

  • Ellen says:

    Never have smelled Victoria’s Secret, so you’re not alone.I don’t have anything that I”m snobbish about, because I can’t afford to be.

  • maggiecat says:

    Victoria Secret has some perfectly nice scents, body lotions, sprays, etc. I used to wear their stuff, too, but alas, gravity becomes the enemy at some point in our lives.
    I’m a handbag snob. There are perfectly find bags out there that do not have a designer name on them and I struggle with owning/carrying them. My current tote is Michael Kors and I love it. It’s durable, practical, useful, and…Michael Kors. Sigh.

    • Musette says:

      Weirdly, I’ve actually gone Reverse Snob with my bags (well, not ALL my bags – Murray and my Bombay are still much-beloved)….. the bag I most love to carry in Summer is this straw tote with leather handles (that I Twilly because Summer = sweaty palms). I get zillions of compliments on it – and I got it for $1.99 (BNWT) at Goodwill.
      March is sending me a VS that she thinks might be The One I was banging on about – and …. well, I might just visit a VS, see what’s what. Ya nebber know… 😉

      xoxoxo

  • lawgoddess says:

    I am a snob about facial tissue. My family growing up always used the cheapest, scratchiest tissues. Now that I buy my own, it’s Puffs all the way, Puffs Plus when I have a cold

  • Jennifer S says:

    I’ll agree with a lot of what Queen-Cupcake is saying actually. And I don’t believe I’m snobbish about any particular things? only more ‘annoyed’ by things which….yeah I have to work on that….

  • Dina C. says:

    I died laughing at “rictus of ‘wtf?'” Probably, very probably, because I would have been in the same situation. 🙂 I love my vintage Arpege, Diors, Emeraude, my Chanels, and other awesome scents. So yes, card-carrying perfume snob for sure. My brother and SIL gave me a cheapie coffret of scents a few years back, and I regifted it a nursing home. Otherwise in life, I tend to tread the middle ground. Neither low-end nor high-end clothes, handbags, makeup, jewelry, etc. Just the happy middle ground.

  • Tara C says:

    I will wear cheapie fragrances, although most of the ones I’ve smelled are not appealing to my nose. I’m definitely a snob about purses and shoes. But mostly I just have champagne taste. LOL.

    • Musette says:

      I had to give up the purses, alas (the acquiring of them, not the ones I already have). I’m mostly on construction sites so carrying Delvaux is just impractical. And I had to give up the shoes. Alas. Heck… I dunno if I have any other snobbery left (heh!)….. yeah, sure….. 😉 xoxox

  • Diana says:

    I am a tea snob. I order my loose leaf tea from a company that imports it from all corners of the globe and I am picky about which varieties I drink. Offer me a cup of tea made from “lipton” and I will turn up my nose because to me, it tastes like what soaking cardboard in water smells like.

    • Musette says:

      that is delightful (seriously). Obvs we are now in an age of nearly-instant gratification but, for some reason, the idea of teas from around the globe conjures up steamships with little boxes of loose-leafed fabulousness making their way to you! xoxox

  • Rustee45 says:

    I am ashamed to confess this, really. I am a dish and flatware snob–I make small internal judgements of people based on how they set their tables. There, I’ve said it. There is so much nice quality lovely old stuff that can be picked up for nearly nothing these days at second hand shops, just lying there unwanted and unappreciated. I myself have numerous sets of dishes, serving and flatware, depending on the occasion and of course the everyday stuff for a house with kids, but if I’m going to invite people over or post something on social media for which I expect a positive response, it’s time to step it up with something more than Corelleware.

  • rosarita says:

    I’m a music snob. Not as bad as my husband, who was a professional studio musician in the 60s but still….and the thing is, I like ALL kinds of music, but modern pop where everything is run through a Voice-a-tron or whatever that thing is that makes everybody sound alike – I hate it. I hate lady singers who yell at me..looking at you, Katy Perry, but there are many others whose names I don’t know. You damn kids get off my lawn and let me listen to my early Motown!

  • Bee says:

    I hope this works: I am a book snob. I used to be a bookseller and as part of the job I was required to read a lot of stuff I would not choose. I read the very first Dan Brown shudder and will never touch another. I hate ‘chick lit’ books- anything with handbags, shoes or wedding bouquets on the cover. I avoid anything with gold foil and a woman spilling out of a period costume. And yet….I love trash SciFi & read cosy crime books – some even have talking cats in them which other people would no doubt despise. Each to their own. And VS Amber Romance is really nice – even in body spray.

    • March says:

      I will be SO TICKLED if the comments issue is now resolved!

    • Musette says:

      my ex-DH (pre-El O) was a used and rare bookseller and a snobbier book guy you won’t find! I owe 99% of my art monograph library to him – bumped corners drove him batty so I’d get those at deep discount!
      I’m with you on the content, though – I dislike nearly all romance but! I am an unrepentant lover of Georgette Heyer (the comedies of manners more than the romance appeals but they are unabashedly stocked in ROMANCE (blushes)

      And…obviously…I’mo have to explore some of VS!

      xoxoxox

      • lawgoddess says:

        I have been reading Georgette Heyer since I was 13. Sprig Muslin was my first. She has been bringing me pleasure for (shudder) 55 years.

  • Neva says:

    I think I’m a scented candles snob. I know some very nice cheaper candles which smell delightful and very potent but I mostly go for the Diptyque, Nicolai, Cire Trudon, F.Malle ones…and then I complain about the wax melting too slow, the smell not being strong enough for the whole room, blahblahblah…

    • Musette says:

      LOL! Been there! I transitioned to Trapp (and my beloved Soyphisticated candles) for that very reason – they are sensibly priced, with great scent and fabbo throw – and if I want more throw, I light another candle at the other end of the room/house because (drumroll, please)…..they cost about 1/10th of the lines you mentioned!

      xoxoxo

      • Neva says:

        Why, oh why have I never thought of buying 2 cheap candles of the same sort??? See, I’m blinded by snobbery 😀 😀

        • Musette says:

          well, now you know! Get thee to Soyphisticated Candles (out of Mason City IA – no affiliation or free stuff, I just love her work) and Trapp (out of Kansas City – been a Trappophile since the Jurassic Era) xoxo

  • March says:

    Also, I’m a lipstick snob, which seems ridiculous but it’s true. A main part of the “lipstick experience” for me is the sense of it being a small luxury; it’s that kind of a treat for me. So, while I love makeup and have all sorts of drugstore loves, I probably wouldn’t fall in love and wear any Wet n Wild lippie because it doesn’t trip that trigger. (drugstore glosses, lip pencils and the like are fine, they’re useful tools lol)

    • Musette says:

      LOL! You know the Universe is gonna mess with you on that, don’t you? You will find THE LIPPIE – the one that completes you – and it will be some Walmart $3.99 thing with fairies on the clear plastic cover. It is always thus. xoxo

  • Queen-Cupcake says:

    Musette, what you may call snobbery I call Discernment. How else is one supposed to navigate the torrent of products, information, entertainment, etc. that our consumer culture spews at us? I am the furthest thing from being a fashionista but am struggling to not dismiss the purported musical accomplishments of a young lady with bright green hair and what I consider to be a weird and off-putting style of dress. I don’t know what Jessica Simpson is, either, but it’s too late for me to worry about. I have a limited amount of time, income and patience to find my way through the maze. I could be (and probably am) a snob about things that matter most to me: music, art, movies, writing (Musette I favor yours highly), and so on. But…some days it seems so random. Please do not let The Girl pick me–I am drowning in Things, especially perfumes. Only pick her up and give her a big sloppy kiss for me. Thanks. P.S. I cannot abide athletic shoes with white soles! They all seem to have them now, so how is one to be snobby about an entire class of products? We used to call them sneakers before they became so expensive and “high tech.”

    • Musette says:

      LOL! E, if I pick up The Girl, I’mo need a truss! And I’m with you on the ‘sneakers’ (though I wear them, since my busted foot has eschewed all non-supporting, fashion shoes)

      I’mo have to check out the BGH young lady – I’ve been off the entertainment grid for some time, alas.
      xoxox

  • March says:

    Pleeeeeaz work comments! OK Anita I think I found your Victoria’s Secret Love Spray and I’ve sent it to you! LOLOL so now you’ll have to report back on whether you think it’s the same and if so, whether you still like it.

    I expect you to keep it prominently displayed by your Mitsouko at all times, ‘kay?

    • Musette says:

      In my best Tom Cuise/Edge of Tomorrow voice: “are you sh!tting me?” Squeeee!

      Thanks!

      • March says:

        Well you’re right, there are a slew of them– but there’s one literally called Love, and it comes in a edp and a lighter mist, and it seems to be one of their more popular items, so I guess we’ll see lol

  • Fred says:

    how about now

  • March says:

    will this work