Halloween Candy

I´m thinking about getting a big roll of those Mr. Yuck stickers to carry around in my purse and stick on store testers as a warning, as a public service, sort of. What do you think? I´d start with…

Stella in Two. The genius here is that there are TWO parts. Part One is an amber solid perfume, in a case that must be made out of lead (what´s heavier than lead, anyway? Plutonium? Kryptonite?). Honestly, I thought it was magnetized and stuck to the counter – it´s almost funny how heavy it is. It smelled like … waxy amber. Part Two, a peony fragrance in a triangle-shaped bottle, seems to have trouble standing up on its own; more than once I have seen it beached there on its side, leaking fluid all over the counter in an oozing, baking mess under the klieg lights of the Saks fragrance corner. The bottle was all wet and sticky so I just sniffed the puddle instead. No thanks. (I´ve also sniffed this twice since. Ugh. I love peony; not sure what it is about this one I dislike so much.)

– Reviews say “sweet” and “bubblegum.” Also “sweet.” Some also mention “powdery.” (Did I say “sweet” already?) So I went over there with my barf bag and some rubber gloves and had a go. What is wrong with everyone? I thought it was great. It´s unisex, and at least it´s not a marine scent, or some gourmand thing. It reminds me a little of the weirdness of Versace Dreamer, with less auto parts and more tootsie roll (I love the Dreamer!) It´s allegedly simple (amber, vanilla and musk) and it´s extremely linear, and so what? WYSIWYG. Rock on, Gaultier! Plus you can stick it to your fridge (assuming you don´t have a stupid Sub-Zero) because it´s MAGNETIZED. The oil smelled fabulous, the same general effect as the monoi stuff. Everything doesn´t have to be eating at Le Cirque, right? Sometimes I just want a really good burger.

That New Crap From Valentino
– they´re spraying it on silk rose petals. I am guessing here: Praline Accord? Oh, my god … Mr. Yuck, hold me! Okay, Neiman Marcus says … bergamot, black currant, and crunch green. Middle notes of orange blossom, gardenia, muguet, and rose. Base notes of sandalwood, orris, musky notes, vanilla, and heliotrope. It´s called Rock n Rose. I´ve … I´ve been heliotroped! Call 911!

Ormond Jayne Orris Noir
. Patty, I think I´d like it, but each time I put it on I go into a wild, sneezing fit. The other OJs don´t do that. Jeez. In fact the only other frag I can think of that makes me sneeze is Trouble. I´ll keep trying.

Hilary Duff Love Ya!
I love Hil. She´s the only one of the Former Child Actresses My Girls Love who hasn´t starved herself down to 90 lbs. smoking and doing blow all night at Bungalow 8. Not naming any names… notes are mangosteen (fruit and blossom), spices, cocobolo wood, amber milk, musk. The fragrance is nicely done, not at all what I expected for a teen queen´s first foray. Gourmand – like chai, sort of, with musk and woods. It´s a bit sweet for my taste in the opening, but I must be 25 years over the target demographic, and I wouldn´t hesitate to give it as a fragrance gift that doesn´t scream Pole Dancer in Training. (Not naming any names.) Can I say the bottle is beautiful? No, really — lovely to hold, too. (Additional comment – huh. For one of those pretty, sort-of-forgettable frags, I´ve tried it several times now, and … and so help me, I might actually buy this. I need some more comfort scents. Ack! They´ll probably card me and refuse to sell…)

Marc Jacobs Fall Splash Tri- – uh, Duo
– I finally tried the Violet, and Ina´s right – it´s nicely done. On me it´s a musky (rather than candied) violet, with a dust of cocoa and a little ginger, and for such a gentle comfort scent it´s surprisingly long-lasting; any violet fans should definitely give it a sniff. It also has what I´ve come to think of as the Insolence Effect – every time I wear it I get compliments from strangers – men and women – who are wild for it. The Ivy isn´t so bad – just a basic citrus/herbal cologne. But the mystery is … where´s the Amber? It´s gone from the shelves. In fact, the SAs at both Sephora and Nordstrom assured me confidently that this set was issued as a duo, and I´m mixing it up with the summer set (and what´s the point of arguing? None.) So riddle me this, batgirls: was the Amber that bad? Is it gone from your shelves too?

Donna Karan New York – the one in the weird, black mutant bottle that reminds me of Darth Vader or a robotic duck (see photo) – not DKNY, which I think is a lighter, summery scent. Notes of rose, lily, apricot, suede, amber, jasmine and patchouli. Anybody remember this? Somebody else weigh in here. It´s interesting. It doesn´t smell like anything else I own. The opening is very rough going, and I´m not loving the drydown either – it doesn´t really smell floral at all – more like spice. I am trying to figure out who this is targeted to … no, I´m not being a snot, I mean it. What do you think it smells like? It’s so … weird on me. Maybe I´m having a skin chemistry issue, I need to try it on someone else?

My question to you: it´s that time of year – all the fragrance gift sets of the season, a million of em! What looks good to you? Anything with a particularly great bonus or packaging you´ve seen?

  • March says:

    Katrina — welcome, hon! Thanks for de-lurking!

    As you know if you read the blog regularly, I am willing to admit I’ve made a mistake, and occasionally I do complete reversals on something I’ve ragged. But I have the feeling this will not be happening with Stella in Two…

  • March says:

    Bliss — wow, that makes me feel better. I mean, I sniff stuff all the time and have been known to trigger the occasional migraine :-” but not sneezing. It’s the weirdest thing! So clearly there is something there… it’s too bad, what I can get of it before my nose goes haywire is good. It’s actually allergy season right now, so I think I’ll leave it alone for a few weeks.

  • March says:

    Erika — given all the stuff out there now, I am TEMPTED.:-w

  • BBliss says:

    Oh – you and Patty could be really dangerous with Mr. Yuck stickers – but that would be hilarious – you two marching through Neimans/Saks with big rolls of censorship!

    OK – Orris Noir was a major letdown – it sounded so perfect! It didn’t just merely “not smell good” on me, it actually made my throat close up (a new and rather unpleasant event). It didn’t do this on my mom and sister’s skin – it was lovely. It made my other sister sneeze – a lot. So, you are not alone. I get along with some other OJs but Tolu also did something odd on me. I’m trying to track down the offending ingredient.

    The Donna Karan too, did weird things on me, and then I never bothered again – I have to dig out my sample.

    Gaulthier sounds fascinating!

  • Erika says:

    Ahahahahahah! I would love to see Mr. Yuck giving me a head’s up on the bad stuff… You’re too funny 🙂

  • March says:

    Robin — it was mean, but — ack!!! It was just tooth-ache powdery-sweet, and I was hoping for something a little more interesting from Valentino, for goodness’ sake.

    So … you’re not holding out for the Mugler coffret from the Perfume movie?:”> Yours sounds like a good choice, I’d like to be revitalized.

  • kuri says:

    Hee, if only we could train the bats to do that! A pity; I can think of some other uses for such amenable bats.

  • March says:

    Marina — so … Daim Blond with big, giant shoulder pads? And big, poufy spiral-permed hair?:d

    I like it.

  • March says:

    Violet — NOOOOO?!?!?! She’s being indoctrinated into the coven of the undead?!?!? I can’t STAND IT! She was my last hope. Can you even remember when all those girls looked NORMAL? And Hil definitely didn’t need bigger teeth…

    Well, there you go. I need to try the DK parfum.

  • March says:

    Kuri — fruit bats live forever. I want them to start biting the people who release insipid fruity-florals:-w

  • March says:

    P — har, HilDu is EXACTLY WRONG for you, and I knew you’d hate it cuz it’s got that same feeling as L. I don’t get fruit — more a gourmand, rotund sweetness that seems to be a loophole in my general anti-foody fragrance rules. To me, Betsey Johnson has the same thing going on.

  • March says:

    Elle — yeah, crunch — maybe that’s the praline I’m smelling. Seriously, I can’t make this stuff up.

    Yep, you can use Gaultier2 to hold up your pizza menus, coupons, kid art… as I commented to Judith, though, go easy the first time, I find it very strong.

  • Robin says:

    Cracking up at “That New Crap From Valentino”…and it sounds like it is.

    Not a big gift set person, but I want a Thierry Mugler Cologne set…”to help any man feel revitalized and invigorated”. I think it might work for a woman too.

  • Marina says:

    Donna Karan smells like Daim Blond on steroids on me. Or rather, like Daim Blond on steroids, stuck in the 1980s. I am saying this affectionately. I own this robotic duck 🙂

  • violetnoir says:

    News flash, babe: Hillary Duff is getting skinnier, and haven’t you noticed her teeth?? Those veneers are horrible. They make her look like Bugs Bunny. :d

    DK New York is great and has been around since forever. However, the parfum is the real gem. It is awfully expensive, but smells like cashmere, lily, leather and amber. Wonderful fragrance for cold weather. Trust me on that one. 😉


  • March says:

    Teacake — I’m going to retry it, thanks for your comments. I’m wondering whether the tester I smelled was fresh. It’s a very interesting smell, and I’m having trouble parsing it. I love your suede jacket description.

  • March says:

    Judith — yeah, you and me both!:(( Somehow I’m pretty sure Santa’s not bringing me the coffret.

    BTW my only warning on the Gaultier (which shares a lot with excellent Dreamer) is: it was one of those things that stuck around forever, until I washed it off the next day, and it’s got major sillage on me. I’d spray gently.

  • March says:

    Dusan — I feel like a dope for missing out on the Gaultier2. You’ve developed some expensive loves, there…

  • March says:

    Stan — that is it EXACTLY — very well put!^:)^ It’s the Dreamer base.

    Any of those would be good Halloween frags.

  • March says:

    Haus — the only Angel I like is Men. I bow down in awe at the original creation, but I would never wear it. So BC is creepy, eh? Wonder what it reminded you of…

  • kuri says:

    I wish we could stick those Mr. Yuck stickers on perfume testers! But then fights might break out. Still, so many boring perfumes that distract consumers from the interesting stuff.

    LOL, how long does a fruit bat live, anyway?

  • Patty says:

    Am I the only person that did not like the Hillary Duff? Yikes! Was I wrong? Fruity floral at first, right? For me, it took the life span of a fruit bat for that to go away, and then it really was pretty nice, I just couldn’t wait that long.

  • Elle says:

    WTH??? Crunch green? I can’t believe they list that as an official note for the new Valentino.
    And a magnetized bottle for Gaultier 2? OK, OK…I know it’s gimmicky, but, sue me – I’m intrigued. I like an element of fun. I also like Versace Dreamer, so I will have to try this one.

  • teacake says:

    Regarding Donna Karan New York I think it *does* smell of suede.. a suede jacket who’s wearer has marinated in perfumes all autumn. I know I have a suede jacket like this, topnotes of many fragrances breathing through suede. As to who it’s targetted at well.. a city dweller for sure. This stuff doesn’t smell so grand outside with woodsmoke and autumn leaves but it suits a cold city day very well.

  • Judith says:

    I guess I need to try Gaulier2–I love the Dreamer. For a gift set, I will take the one that was made up for Parfum, the movie. I’ve already alerted my DH, although he’s VERY good at ignoring me on things like this!

  • Dusan says:

    Wow, 2 Gaultier2 fans already! Count me in – love the stuff, have been loving it since last October, when I got it as a gift. So glad you like it March, and I also agree on the similarity with the Dreamer – Stan above sums it up neatly.
    Not looking for new frags as I splashed out recently on The Dreamer (would never have but for you, March 🙂 ), Declaration, Egoiste and the stunning bell-jar Fumerie Turque (hello, Stan, my FT!), my first SL. New SL loves (per 7 wax samples they included) are La Myrrhe, TC, EeL, RdN and MM. My heart belongs to Serge now, as do all my future salaries 😀

  • Stan says:

    To me, Gaultier2 is the very base of dreamer. It lacks the florals/tobacco and jumps straight to the base. I remember when I showed my best friend this one, he exclaimed that it smelled like Dreamer!

    Hmm, for Halloween I think I’m going to wear Messe de Minuit, M7, or perhaps a Serge Lutens (Fumerie Turque?) this year.

  • hausvonstone says:

    March – I agree on the Gaultier. I think it’s pretty great, and have debated buying it, even though these days I am completely grossed out by Angel (and double by Angel Violet – and I like violet), which I wore when I was a wee lass. For some reason, they sell the 2 bottle set for 56 euro while one bottle is 40 – at least in the airports – good deal! I think my frag tastes are close to yours and Colombina’s from PST – it’s good to have such a frame of ref. Tried Black Cashmere yesterday at a dept. store – it smelled FAMILIAR in a weird way. Kinda creeped me out. But not as much as trying KL – which they still sell, and I wore in high school.