Off Topic: One Year Later

Many of you know that last year I lost a dear friend. I hate to admit that I am actually a little angry at her for having died; she was overweight and did not take care of her health. She never exercised (I should talk) and refused to take responsibility for her own good heath (aging, I should talk..)

But we were instant pals from the moment we met when we were in college. She attended Smith while I was at UMass and since there was a five-college exchange program, we shared a film course at Amherst. She was a flamboyantly pretty black woman in the middle of lilly-white Northampton and sometimes before class we would hit Thorne’s Market make-up counter to paint her lids with combinations of fuchsia and purple guaranteed to shock the bourgeois. It was a 35 year friendship that grew stronger when I moved to Los Angeles, where she was a native.

Of course, one of her loves was perfume. She loved the feminine ones: 24 Faubourg was a favorite as was Anais Anais. One of her later loves was Luten’s Al A Nuit, which I was happy to gift her. She rather comically over-applied sometimes. Once at Agent Provocateur she doused herself with so much I had to leave the area. Too much was never enough for Lynn.

She was sometimes vexing, but never dull. I miss her.

Photo is from her obit. It was taken in college. She hated being photographed.

  • filomena813 says:

    The photo of you friend looks like she was beautiful inside and out. Things are never the same when we lose someone we love.

  • Musette says:

    oh, darling. Sending you BIG hugs <3

  • Portia says:

    Hugging you Tom.
    Portia xx

  • maggiecat says:

    It sounds as if you and the world as a whole lost someone very special. I’m sorry. And I’m still angry with my dad who died 7 years ago from COPD after a lifetime of smoking. I keep thinking he should be here to enjoy his great grandson (whose name he shares).

  • aquaman22 says:

    sorry for your loss. ūüôĀ i lost a friend after 6 years with breast cancer, and it has all the ambiguous feelings you would expect. she was angry at us all, isolated herself, made music, and also effectively made it so that we all remembered her as she was 6 years ago. but i am racked with guilt that (even after i took care of her as an unpaid nurse for 2 solid years) she was so angry it allowed us all to go about our lives without worrying about her. you could never ask her how she was, tell her you did something fun; etc. it was awful, and now it’s all over, but none of it is resolved. G-d bless you.

  • Lemoncake says:

    Tom – what a lovely tribute to your friend. In her photo she looks beautiful and self-aware. Thank you for sharing your memories.

  • Maya says:

    She was a very pretty woman – and also “flamboyant” – and probably smart. Sounds like a great and winning combination. I always feel sad when someone who is fun and lively and loves life dies. A unique spark is forever gone. You honor Lynn by missing her. Just remember to also smile when you think of her.

  • Nelle says:

    Sorry for your loss