All I seem to be able to think about these days is spring and cherries and flower gardening. It´s way too early to actually go shopping or excavating in my backyard (needs a total flower garden overhaul), so I´m going excavating through some perfumes that have crossed my desk lately. I have the attention span and memory of a gnat, so quick little reviews like March does have won me over.

Hermessence Osmanthe Yunnan - yes, this one is as ephemeral and light as a little tart fairy with dusty wings, but does that make me like it any less? Nay, I say. Tea, orange, freesia, osmanthus and apricot are the notes. I´m not sure it´s FBW, though I did get the Full Bottle anyway, but I believe these are now available in the Discovery Set from Hermes boutiques, or will be in the next month. This is the summer fragrance that is not too sweet, not too tart, not overbearing. It doesn´t exactly disappear quickly, it´s just very subtle. Definitely one you could spritz with abandon go to the office or a wedding or just go relax in the hammock with some PBR in a Coozie. Review at NST and review at PST

Chocolovers by Aquolina spray and lotion – A little dark violet tossed this bon-bon at me, and though I love chocolate, I normally don’t like it on me. Serendipitous I like for about five minutes, and then I want a full hose-down. Chocolovers did NOT start out well, there was all sorts of coconut-like smells that are probably hazelnut or something else, and I was whining like an orphaned pup trying to get it off, but I just closed my eyes and waited, and then sniffed again in about 15 minutes, and it wasn’t staying that strong and it was turning into a rather nice vetiverish, smooth mocha kinda thing. This is so not horrible, it’s pretty likable, even for a nonfoody scent s*ut like me. With summer coming, I probably wouldn’t wear it, but by next fall and winter, it should fill a space on those days when I just want to feel like I fell into a lovely cup of hot cocoa.

Serge Lutens Chergui — Since March just did this one and then sent me some, I’ve just got to say this one is like The Nazgul without Sauron’s interference. In short, I like it. Rich, spicy, smoky — a jacked-up, sweet Fumerie Turque.

BTW, when ordering from the Hermes boutique, don’t call Ambre Narguile by its True Name, their SAs really don’t have a sense of humor.

Patty

KISS to release perfume line

Now the veteran rockers are stepping away from fridge magnets and belt buckles to offer a far sexier product with their new line of seductive scents.
According to frontman PAUL STANLEY, the range will live up to Kiss’ wild reputation – he claims the line is “Unrepentantly sexy, and a little naughty”.

If they can make a perfume that smells like “Beth,” I would be all in favor of their fragrance endeavor. I loved that song, still do, it was the perfect love ballad. I hope Taylor or Ace sings it in “American Idol” this year. So is Ace totally hot or what? ::::::swoon::::: If I was 20 years or so younger, I’d be throwing my panties on the stage with me in them.

In honor of K.I.S.S’ embarcation on the Great Ship Perfume, and the impending spring, I offer up this, and I dare you not to hum along and not see yourself driving down a California highway in a convertible or at a kegger on a hot summer night. And a picture of Ace too, can’t forget that.

Beth I hear you calling
But I can’t come home right now
Me and the boys are playing
And we just can’t find the sound

Just a few more hours
And I’ll be right home to you
I think I hear them calling
Oh Beth what can I do
Beth what can I do

You say you feel so empty
That our house just ain’t our home
I’m always somewhere else
And you’re always there alone

Just a few more hours
And I’ll be right home to you
I think I hear them calling
Oh Beth what can I do
Beth what can I do

Beth I know you’re lonely
And I hope you’ll be alright
‘Cos me and the boys will be playing all night

Patty

Is there some sort of Murphy´s law in effect at my Regular Joe Department Store? I go there and try to buy some undies, or a set of towels, and the sales clerks scatter like gazelles into the far reaches of each floor.

I have to stalk them until I corner the one who’s too busy yammering on a cel phone to notice my ambush, and then I have to mad-dog him/her until he/she rings up the sale, usually while continuing to take that personal call.

The perfume counter, in contrast, is the one place I´d like to stop and smell the roses (and musks, and marine accords) in peace. And that´s the one place the sales clerks are trolling like starving hyenas.

It´s no small wonder I bug the hell out of them. I´m all over the map, for one thing. I want to smell the Baby Phat Goddess and then the Curious – is this the original one? And then the Arpege, please. No, I do not want to smell Pure Turquoise. Yes, the Vera Wang is very nice and no, I don´t want to smell it. No, I have already smelled that new Estee Lauder, and I am not interested. (Here´s a hint: telling me “We sell a ton of this!” is probably not going to be a deal closer with me. Neither is the fact that for my $70 I get the matching lotion, the powder, the room spray and for all I know a heart-shaped diffuser to hang from my rear view mirror).

I made a sincere effort at the Department Store because I wanted to include at least one easily obtainable frag in today´s Candy Post, and here it is:

My Queen by Alexander McQueen – Here’s one you don´t need eBay or a French Connection to get ahold of. “Meant To Make Every Woman Feel Like A Queen.” Puh-lease. But the notes sound great on paper: Almond, Violet (top), White Musk, Florals, Heliotrope (middle), Cedar, Vetiver, Vanilla And Iris Notes (base). And it is those things, quite pleasantly almond-y, violet and heliotrope for about 10 minutes. And then … (Cue the music from Jaws.) I believe this is the rest of the equation: almond + musk = Play-Doh. I mean, it´s not BAD. It´s just not… good, either. And in 20 minutes, consider it gone. I wasn´t expecting Serge staying power for $55, but come on.

Speaking of Play-Doh… People of the Labyrinths Luctor et Emergo – this is the Play-Doh one, right? I went and looked at NST, and whatever glory you guys are getting from this, it sure escapes me. I get an opener of incense, Play-Doh, followed by a big spoonful of vanilla, and … Play-Doh. I agree the smell of Play-Doh is theoretically a comfort scent, but not for me. Maybe I´ve spent too much time trying to dig it out of the carpet and cracks in the floor with a toothpick. Actually, Play-Doh is officially a banned substance in our house, pretty much for that reason.

Editions de Parfums Frederic Malle Musc Ravageur – Cait wrote the funniest thing about how her dad´s shorthaired pointers were REALLY digging this scent when she was trying it out. Definitely the sort of smell that, if I´d taken a walk through the neighborhood, all the male dogs would have jumped their fences and pursued me with One Thing on their minds. It´s that dirty, and I love dirty, so I loved the first 30 minutes of this. But then it´s just vanilla and amber. Okay, okay, still some musk there, but where goes the trash-talking, junk-in-the-trunk part? I got so bored I dumped some Jicky parfum on top of it. Hah. NOW we´re talkin´! If I keep doing that I´ll probably burn a hole through my hand but, God, it was so good it must be illegal.

Serge Lutens Tuberose Criminelle (Part 3) – I refused to actually put this on, I gave my sample away, and Robin and Patty told me I had to get it back and try it, so I did. The Big Cheese and I work together. He looked over at me the other day with a thoughtful expression and said, you´ve really got your bitch on today, don´t you? It was true. I did. That sort of day is useful for taking care of outstanding administrative snafus, so I applied half my large vial of TC and headed off to the bank to offend some people regarding an account there. TC answered two questions for me: first, can you hate something on yourself while other people love it? (Yes. I got not one but TWO compliments on this, one of which was still during the Vap-o-Rub phase). Second, can the beauty of the drydown overcome the horror of the opening? For me, sadly, no.

Wild Woods by Coty – well, this reminds me of something (SMN Citta di Kyoto?) It does NOT remind me of the rest of the current Coty ouevre of watered-down classics and wretched musks (Vanilla Fields, anyone?) This is labeled for men, and would smell great on a guy, but it´s a perfect unisex frag that makes me think of those thin Japanese incense sticks. Thanks to Marina for turning me on to this one. If you like a dry, woody incense, buy this online for $10. (No, that is not a typo.) It´s so good, Coty will probably discontinue it. If someone asks you what they´re wearing, I think what Marina and I finally came up with was “Bois Sauvage.”

Gazelles, John Fields
Nymphs and Satyr, William-Adolphe Bouguereau

March

Soap Art Creations Bath and Body: Soaps, Bath Bombs, Candles

I just had to order a bar or two of this soap, but this soap on a roll is just so darn cute! They have soap art with pictures on them and aromatic wicking things way cheaper than the ones I got from Needless Markup. Will review these when they come in, but always want to share the shopping love! This one is Bahama Cherry. Lord, I’m having me some cherry love these days, don’t know why. I crave them, but haven’t indulged — cherry pie, cherry ice cream — so this soap and Rahat are going to have to tide me over.

Do you suppose this is a Menopause thing?

Patty

Before I put in this post of March’s, I don’t have that good of an excuse, except real job demands are interfering, but should be abating tomorrow, and I hope to get something written then.

From March:

We are in the midst of the Big Cheese Family Reunion, months in the planning. There are 17 people staying here right now, half of them children. If you dropped by you´d think I was running a wildly creative but extremely disorganized preschool, staffed by loud men with drinking problems.

I am cooking food in what I think of as diner quantities. Breakfast: 4 lbs of bacon, 2 dozen eggs. And that was just for the GUYS. (What perfume goes with the smell of bacon-saturated clothing? Chergui. No, seriously.)

So. No perfume blogging. In fact, no computer time, period. I have some notes, but just can´t get a decent perfume post together. I hear these people are leaving Wednesday.

In times like these, I hit the Apres l´Ondee pretty hard. It doesn´t seem to offend no matter how much I dump on, and it comforts me, although right now I´d take a Valium if I could find one.

In lieu of a regular post, here´s a link to a story in the Washington Post called Appealing to the Senses, about the new high-tech marketing approaches of creating scented packages – new scented inks, for example, or scented drink-through bottle caps that improve the customer´s perception of the taste. Interesting stuff.

Patty