(Okay, peeps — for the next couple of weeks we may be messing with the usual posting order. Today is Musette.)
I got a visit from the Life Police a little while ago. They gave me a ticket!!! and told me to shut down my Pity Party, it was going on too long, it was too loud and the neighbors were starting to complain. I was indignant! I loved hosting that party! But a warning ticket from the Life Police ain’t no joke so I decided to comply. But where to start?
Well, insides are harder than outsides so I started with the outside. OMG! 2 sizes bigger? when did THAT happen?!? My haiiiiiir! !!!! what’s with the nails – are you reroofing the Vatican with your bare hands? 2 SIZES BIGGER? WTH? WHY ARE YOU IN SWEATS? YOU ARE NOT AT THE GYM! HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN SWEATS???
Okay You (well, ‘me’) – First Thing: get your lard-butt up and get to the gym, every day. I live in the smallest town in the Universe. We are blessed with a little gym 2 blocks from my house (everything is two blocks from my house). Nobody’s there and they have HGTV and What Not to Wear. No excuses! Then my existential walk through our hilly cemetery every day (get healthy!/ why bother?)… 2 blocks from my house. No excuses.
Man. This is hard. I’m so used to sitting on my lard-butt, eating a brownie and bemoaning my fate. But I’m slogging through it.
…and slowwwwly…the poundages are slippering off. And hey! Nails? They’re actually ‘done’. And the hair – well, I’ve still got to go to a Big City for that (some things just …well, you know – it’s my hair!).
And while I’m in this improvement mode I’m noticing that my perfume choices have changed – are being assigned certain values. Perhaps I’m every bit as insane as y’all think I am but I swear there are perfumes that make me smell fat! And some that sort of help on the thinnin’ side of things. This came to me whilst reading Shelley’s blog post on comfort scents, where she broke things down by variations on comfort (snuggly/armored/etc) – so while I was working the elliptical I compiled my Thick/Thin lists. This is in relation to myself alone – these scents do not conjure up any size imagery when worn by others so don’t get all bitey with me, okay? As they say, YMMV.
The List (for now)
I feel thinner already (at the gym):
No 19 edt, screaming at me to WORK IT!
I don’t think so. that’s when the zombies come out!
I feel a cupcake coming on!
Whoa! my bra size is WHAT?
C-cup, bay-bee! C-cup!
3am. I’m fat! Panic attack.
Going for a walk, just me and the coyotes. Take a stick and:
L’eau Imperiale (Guerlain)
Y’know, I’m looking pretty good!:
I give up – I’m a mess
Ines de la Fressange (leaf bottle)
Oh, shut up. I’m doing fine!
TdC Charmes et Feuilles
Size 10 = a trip to Paris
it will be interesting to see where these fall, once I reach my size goal, but for now they are defining my highs and lows as I struggle through this. Do you all have particular scents that represent certain aspects of your life struggles? (weight is not the criterion here) Would love to hear about them. I’ll holla back when I get home from the cemetery – gotta beat the zombies!