Oh, honey…

…..really?  You’re kidding, right?   Marc.  MarcMarcMarcMarcMarc!  Know what day it is?  This is Smack Marc Day.   Not that you’ll care, as you jet your $100million self off to Paris/St Barts/Mars,  while I struggle with the right Shift key on my ailing board.   But I gotta say…




…really?  Aw.  No.  C’mon.  You did Lemon – and it is the zingy goodness of LEMON!  And I loved the crisp snap of apple; even though I’m not a fan of apple scents, your Apple splash wove the crisp green Snap! of Granny Smith with a bit of citrus zest and some flowers.  Cool.

And I loveLOVE Honey – so I was looking forward to seeing what alllll the hype-ola was about, with the banners and stand signs and WhoShotJohn clogging Nordies and Macy’s aisles……

……..but wait!  No testers.  Whaaa?  Every store I went to, there was enough marketing foofaraw to smoke a hive – but I couldn’t keep knocking over the Honey displays to find a tester.  Finally, at Macy’s, I waded through the jam-packed aisles of boxes and barrels and gobs of schtuff (really, that store is beginning to look more and more like Costco, I swear)..found a SA huddled down behind a counter (with even MORE schtuff)…and asked her for a tester.  She grimly plunged through the displays and pulled out the cute little bottle……I was hoping, from all the bee hype, to get something akin to Perlier’s Miele line….(no need to go into SergeWorld but something ‘honey’ would be great)….

…but……so …well, I spritzed it…and got the most generic fruity-floral since ..well, since the last generic fruity-floral.  At Wal-Mart.  A few tentative sniffs…read the notes…the SA watched… I sniffed a bit more “maybe I need to let it dry down for a minute??”….she sniffed my wrist and said ” well, the honey is listed as a top note so maybe it’s already…gone?” (this was less than 30 seconds after I sprayed)……we  stopped, looked at each other..and, as if on cue, both burst into hysterical laughter!

Yeah, Marc.  I know.  You. Don’t. Care.  But….couldn’t you have dropped a dollop?  At least put some bee-pee in there?  Something?  I dunno….maybe it’s me.  But I don’t think so.   This is a waste of a Perfectly Good Name.   You are better than this, Marc.   So, if you are reading this I want you to go sit on your terrace and think about what I’ve said here – and the next ‘note’ you design a perfume around, it’d better have the damn note somewhere in the perfume ‘kay?  I know you can do it – you did it for Biscotti, Lemon and Ginger.  So get with the program!!   Honey can’t be that hard – and if it is, then leave the damn name off the bottle!   Just call it …….oh, I know!  You could call it ‘Dash’!  Nobody would know the difference!


xoxo Musette, The Bitter Queen

(to the tune of ‘Soft Kitty’)

Dark honey/Warm Honey

Sergie did it best

Marc should stick to lemons

Give the bee a rest


(yeah, Like Marc Cares)

  • I tried this too, and hated it.

  • Devon H says:

    I get angry at every MJ release. I have no respect for MJ scents. They’re all terrible, waste of money, out FOR the money (the brand), and I find the packaging revoltingly juvenile on every single bottle. What an ass. Stick to clothes and handbags, MARC. You suck at fragrance.

  • aparatchick says:

    What is it with naming a perfume “honey” or “honeymania” and then not coming across with the goods?!!? Argh!

  • HemlockSillage says:

    Oooh! I have The Naked Bee’s hand wash in Orange Blossom Honey, and it is lovely. A bit overwhelming in fragrance, really, but I have thoroughly enjoyed it. (And you can put me in the camp that enjoy’s Miel de Bois and MAC Naked Honey :D) I will have to look for their hand cream. Be well.

  • Dina C. says:

    I’m in agreement with all y’all who think this MJ Honey was a big waste of marketing and development money. I was not impressed. Honey is one of those notes that usually does not float my boat. The only time I have enjoyed it was in hand cream made by The Naked Bee; it’s a niche line of natural, organic stuff. Smells good, not too spendy, feels nice and absorbs well.

  • Kandice says:

    This was hilarious! Good for you for remaining hopeful about his fragrances. I gave up on them long ago! Glad you did this review, however. I like honey and might have been drawn in to trying his fragrance again without this review. Now I won’t waste my time 🙂

    • Musette says:

      Kandice – I confess to not seeking it out for any other reason that there was just so much ADVERTISING! I swear, I couldn’t walk down Nordies or Macy’s aisles without being whacked in the face by a Honey sign. But I’m glad I did, so now you don’t have to!!!! 😀


  • maggiecat says:

    I couldn’t wait to try this either, and I was sooo disappointed. Not just that it didn’t smell like honey, but that it was so…meh. I loved Biscotti (and receive multiple compliments every time I wear it). I can’t imagine wearing this though – it smells as if this is the scent One Direction should have made. Body Shop’s Honemania is much better, and it’s not great (the soaps are wonderful though. Get some. Enjoy. Maybe the body butter too.)

    • Musette says:

      I was going to try the Body Shop Honeymania but that damn site is hijacking every page I load – so I refuse, just on principle (where is the arms-crossed emoticon when you need him!).


      but maybe, when they settle the hell down, I’ll try it!

  • Gwenyth says:

    Ah, Musette, you are a GEM!
    Your posts are always insightful, and always SO very clever! I adore reading your words. I nearly spewed hot tea all over my keyboard, however.
    You are a writing genius 🙂 Your poem is fantastic.

    My daughter and I were very excited to try Marc Jacobs ‘Honey’. Our twin reactions must have been comical to see — equal parts of disappointment and frustration. Both of us blurted “What the WHAT?” after we sniffed our trial spritzes at the store.

    I adore honey — and would dearly love to find some perfume that carried that “warm fuzzyness” I get from smelling real honey.
    Ideas? To my nose, Olympic Orchids Golden Cattleya is a beautiful honey fragrance.

  • LaurenW says:

    I tried this at Macy’s, too, and hated it. And while I was smelling it and hating it, I was getting the worst ever hard sell from one of the SAs (If I were You, I would not wait to buy it. I’d get it today if I were you). Awful. But, when I got home many hours later, the drydown was very pretty.

    • Musette says:

      those Macy’s SAs can be BRUTAL!!! I never did get to the drydown – in fact, I forgot all about it, about 3 minutes after leaving the counter. Glad it was pretty! xoxoxoA

  • Joining the Honey-bashing here… That juice did something unusual to me when I spritzed it on: it made me angry. Such a wimpy watery fruit salad had no business bearing such a name — I agree with you Musette, it’s a waste. And to think Firmenich (which made Honey) has such a lovely honey absolute!

  • eldarwen22 says:

    I don’t know why Marc Jacobs puts more time and effort into the bottle and not the perfume. I was never really interested in his perfumes (generic smelling) then came Daisy. A SA sprayed me with Daisy and it took all my might not to recoil in horror. Daisy brings up the mental image of strawberry leaves for some reason. Nothing but leaves. Ginestet Botrytis is a likeable honey perfume. Botrytis is a kissing cousin to 1270.

  • Portia says:

    Hiys Musette,
    I think it was a typo, he was talking about how little MONEY he’d spend on the juice and how much MONEY he’d make anyway because he spent so much MONEY on having the bottle and advertising designed. It should have been MONEY.
    Honey was, and is, a terrible mistake.
    Portia xx

  • Mals86 says:

    Yeah. Marc.Don’t.Care.

    I am still a fan of Daisy, I confess – it just smells pretty. Perfect wallpaper scent (and you know, my husband likes it!). No, it’s not particularly interesting, but sometimes you NEEEEED wallpaper. Everything since then? Phoned in. Even Ivy, and that should have been great.

    Honey I’m kinda iffy about in perfume. Don’t like Armani Code, didn’t like MAC Naked Honey (on me? toilet cleaner), did NOT get on with Miel de Bois. Didn’t like Back to Black, Chergui smells like Old People’s Houses to me… I like a good honeyed floral, though: LeLong pour femme, Amoureuse…

    • Musette says:

      I love Lelong! Will have to revisit Amoureuse! Have you tried the old Perlier (the hand cream)? It’s what got me hooked on honey scents. xoxoxoA

  • Bastet says:

    My favorite honey perfume is Diva (Ungaro) – a beautiful honeyed rose. I’m so glad the weather is now cooling down so I can start wearing it again regularly.

  • Lynne Marie says:

    Yes!! I was so cranky when I finally sniffed it and got everything BUT honey – what a disappointment. I love honey. All the energy went into the bottle design. Sigh. One of my favorite honey scents is By Kilian’s Back to Black. So pretty.

  • Ann says:

    What a shame! Although I’ve kind of given up on MJ’s stuff; nothing beyond the original gardenia-ish one ever grabbed me much. But the apple one sounds interesting — might have to try that.

  • Mrs. Honey says:

    I did not smell any honey at all and found it less likeable than many other generic perfumes. In fact, I am pretty sure I could find something nicer at Wal-Mart.

  • Jackie b says:

    I though it was just me!
    It never even got beyond the tester strip it was so boring. Thanks for the reassurance, my nose still works!

  • Belle says:

    Geez, if that’s the name, he could’ve at least make a honey “impression” if it none of the real stuff ain’t gonna be in the perfume.

  • poodle says:

    It is a total waste of a name. The only thing it has in common with honey is that it’s sweet but there isn’t a whiff of honey in that bottle.

  • solanace says:

    I was really, REALLY hoping for something like l’Occitane’s. I bet the focus group didn’t like the honey. Any of it. And these guys forgot that teens have to be taught. I didn’t like Magie Noire at first, but kept wearing it anyway because the marketing was so spot on, and now of course I’m here. Marc could be doing something interesting with his fumes, but you are right, he has other fish to fry. And we will always have uncle Serge. I have not tried Miel de Bois, though. What do you say, Musette, no cat pee for you?

    • Diana Ross says:

      I wear Miel de Bois, and I have to admit that when I first got it, I was paranoid that I’d smell like cat pee based on reviews/comments. I had purchased it w/o reading anything, on sniff alone. For the 1st week, I sheepishly approached all my perfume friends asking “I don’t smell like the litterbox, do I?” After being reassured many times that I was fine, I can now wear it without the paranoia… but yeah, I’m always on a bit of alert when I reach for the bottle.

  • Elia says:

    Yeah I sprayed it last week and struggled to find the honey.
    I let Linda sniff it too not knowing what it was. “Some flower, some green…”. And then said it’s meant to be honey. “Really???”
    Rather disappointing. Cute bottle though.