Walk with me.
So….this is a rambling Musettey tale, involving my birthday, my friends, an eye infection…and True Love.
As you heard from the gorgeous (really! gorgeous!) Hemlock Sillage, we had a blast during my Birthday Extravaganza With Portia. Everyone was just SO lovely! Saturdays Francine brought her phenomenal World Peace cookies (which I sort of shared – but I’m a greedy guts so it wuz HORD!!!) Terri brought MALLOMARS! You know…that’s a gal thing. It’s a friend thing. It’s a Posse Thing. Bring a fat broad cookies for her birthday and never, ever, EVAH even blink, though you know she could easily do without – and probably should. I felt so loved and was so honored by all my wonderful peepuls coming to celebrate with me. Alas, a couple of weird things happened.
I got a stye. Yes (sty? no, that’s pigs. stye, I think, though Spellcheck is arguing) – anyhoo….Remember in the old days when you took tons of photos, and only choose the most flattering one to post on your blog? Then came ‘selfies’ and Facebook and omg! Photos abound all over the Internet. So ….Vain Musette had this whole thing planned – mah hurr was going to be FIERCE in that fabulous way… my face? a picture of poreless perfection. Figure all tightened up and looking grand….oh, yes. I was gonna ROCK the birthday.
Stye. Doc said “eyelid scrubs”. Wth are eyelid scrubs? Turns out it’s pretty simple – you scrub your eyelids with No More Tears. Rinse like a boss. Scrub again. Rinse again. Then you put some Vanicream on them. And a hot compress.
AND NO MAKEUP!
Crap. No makeup.
Mah hurr? Omg. New colorist. Who was completely janked UP. Foils. Gotta foil. I kept waiting for the foils. No foils. Instead, she just lost her mind, kept babbling and started applying color….patches of bright red, bright gold and …..omg I looked like some Calico cat! Add to it the rain, the weird, freezing weather…. I swung from drowned Calico cat to Buckwheat Calico cat and….oh, it was Buck WILD!.
Grabbed a Bad Bra. My girls were down around my knees. omg.
But you know what? Who cared? I looked around and saw only love and kindness and good people who wanted to hang out with my stye-eyed, calico-ed self. And poof! just like that! the vanity took a serious back seat to a wonderful time.
Though some of those FB photos are rrrrrough! LOL!
So…while I’m basking in the glow of all this love and fabulosity…..Lisa of Surrender to Chance hands me an envelope. She asks me to sniff the contents, read the PR and either review or just post the PR on these two scents – then she tells me that she and Patty have worked with Dominique Dubrana to create two new jasmine scents. I swear to Floyd, I couldn’t have been more terrified if she’d handed me a zombie velociraptor! I ain’t a fan of jasmine. What if I really , REALLY hate these? And everybody knows I’m personal friends with these two women! How could you possibly take any review of mine seriously – it’s like me reviewing something my mom made, for yike’s sake. Shaking in my boots, I muster up a sickly grin and shove the package in my bag. Lisa gives me that understanding side eye…she knows I am freaking out….crap.
I kind of forget about it until Wednesday, as I’m on the train back home…..’crap. it’s Jasmine’. So I pull out the first vial, Surrender. Slick a bit on. YIPE! It smells like I just ran somebody’s …um…you know….that little puckery thing…over my arm. That’s when I remember why I don’t ‘get’ jasmine. I. Am. Dismayed. Pull out the PR and read about it….it’s a ‘bridal scent’. Really? Well, I guess if you’re marrying a baboon…you know…the ones with those really bright booty folds? Big sigh. BIG. I’mo have to just put up the PR on this one.
I nod off. Wake up about 15 minutes later and reach over to check my phone….the movement releases this….omg! THE MOST INCREDIBLY BEAUTIFUL SCENT, EVAH! What the hell IS that??? I’m looking around, sniffing like a hound….and then I realize: it’s my left wrist! That baboon-arse has turned into the most sensual floral I’ve smelled in….omgosh I don’t even know when I’ve smelled something so …sexy? But not vavaVOOM! sexy. No. It’s the kind of pre-coitus, anticipatory flush, where the blood is running just under the skin and every nerve ending is humming with anticipation. It’s the promise, given earlier, now ready to be kept. I didn’t trust my nose so I reapplied (yep! right there on the train. The guy behind me had a cold and his girlfriend was getting on my last nerve with her grating laugh. I felt completely justified in spritzing again. So there). Yep. wow. That opening is several jasmine absolutes that give that indolic blast, made even more manifest by a healthy wallop of hyraceum (Hyrax). It’s so potent that it pretty much renders me null and void for the first few minutes. Then it smooths out and becomes quietly stunning. Someone described it as ‘milky’ and that’s a perfect description.
Patty has a soft spot for brides – I think it’s her sunny disposition melding with the idea of the beginning of a new Life chapter – and her love of that is so evident in this scent (Plus, she is Alllllll! about The Sexy!) This is a beautiful scent for a bride – but also for anyone who loves the idea of a LIFE scent. The press copy says Dubrana’s “fragrances are intended as a form of spiritual perfume-therapy and his belief is that the two natural functions of perfume are delight and healing.” Well…I am definitely delighted.
There are several way, WAY more erudite reviews of this glorious perfume – you all know I suck at those, so I’m going to link you to Mark Benhke’s fabulous post in Colognoisseur for all the science-y bits (that’s not faint praise, btw – if I could write like that, I would!).
Your big ol’ donkey girl here says this:
1. If you love jasmine, definitely sample this one
2. If you are iffy about jasmine, definitely try this one
3. If jasmine turns you into a raging zombie velociraptor, mebbe not.
Note: there is a second scent: Cold Water Canyon (shown here). I have not reviewed it here because this review is long enough and (AND!) I think Cold Water Canyon is gorgeous enough to deserve its own moment in the sun. So more, later, on that one.