When one sets out to narrow down to six perfumes her favorites, what she should do instead is grab a Xanax,  place her head under the pillow, hold it down firmly so nobody hears and scream until the mood passes.

But I didn’t. Instead I have come up with the list of the six perfumes that I cannot live without, under any circumstances, and which best define who I am or want to pretend to be. So they may or may not be the perfumes that I admire most as great creations, though I think all on this list are that, but they are the ones most beautiful to me. The agonies of discarding beloved perfumes from this list has been horrible. Warning, there are a couple of incidences of cheating to narrow this down…

1. Ormonde Woman. Full-bodied green velvet –think Miss Ellen’s Poitiers from Gone with The Wind, after they got made into that beautiful green gown for Scarlett. A little saucy and tart, makes you pucker sometimes, not sure if you like it or not, but inevitably its charm wears you down. Parfum version preferred, it just amps up the annoyance and the charm.

2. Guerlain Après L’ondee. Melancholy, regretful, but completely full of hope. It is sorrow at 1,000 yards, where you can look at it and appreciate the exquisite pain without really feeling it. The numb place before the real pain sets in or after it has gone. EDT or parfum will work.

3. Le Labo Patchouli 24/Vanille 44 – Okay, this is a cheat, I know, I know! But they GO together, kids! A spritz of Patch down the front of your shirt for depth and tarry resonance and a couple of spritzes of Vanille over your outer clothes and in your hair creates a cloud of woody vanilla over that tar - truly the most amazing and comforting scent in the world.

4. Christian Dior Dorling vintage parfum. What a cold, unfeeling thing it starts off as, and you’re thinking it has no soul; it’s finicky, much too churlish and standoffish to love. That’s when Dorling brings the magic. It warms not into the most beautiful girl in the room, but the most interesting, the one you have to stop and pay attention to, sit and talk with. Anthropomorphize much? Well, this perfume seems completely human to me, and she never fails to amaze me.

5. CB Cradle of Light/Strange Invisible Perfumes Lady Day/Serge Lutens Sarrasins. Yes, I’m cheating, but any of these three could fit here, and any day will have me changing my mind. They are gorgeous jasmine treatments, and each stuns me and can keep me mesmerized all day with its beauty - sort of a hypnotic sniffing loop.  Everyone has to have a jasmine on their list, unless you hate jasmine, but you should get over it and put one on your list anyway… or three.

6. Serge Lutens Iris Silver Mist. Give me that overabundance of cold, rooty iris with a dollop of spice in the drydown, and I’ll give you my unadorned and complete, lavish devotion for a lifetime.  Genius, brilliant, and a joy to wear on any day of the year.

While I started off with a list of five, I had to expand it to six because none of these would exit the list. Now, as I read comments, I will find my head exploding as you guys mention perfumes that should be on this list, and there is a subset of about 100 perfumes that go beneath these that I also can’t live without, but these are the list of six’ish that I will have in embarrassing amounts for all of my life.

What’s your six?

Annoying American Idol part of Friday:  Ramiele is GONE, yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mop-up items:  Winner of the Indult C16 and CdG Hinoki samples are:  Tom (tmp00) and Six.  Just click on Contact us over on the left, and send me you address and I’ll ship you the samples! 

Item One: Sniffa attendees — you should all have gotten your email itineraries. I didn’t realize it was such a full schedule. What say we try to hook up during the two-hour cocktail deal Saturday night (6:30 - 8:30) at BlueMercury, assuming we haven’t met already? Everyone in the Posse wears a scarf or bandanna? How does that sound? I’m thinking about wearing a tiara. Too much?

Okay, today’s post. Maria sent me a package — with a typed letter, organizing her thoughts. I thought it would be fun sharing it with you.

“Dear March,

Here are a few things in various categories.

Some Scents You May Not Yet Know

Comptoir Sud Pacifique Thé EDP, discontinued several years ago. “Don’t worry about your blood sugar level! CSP used to produce some fragrances with character. Lapsang souchong is at the base of this strong scent. Warning: this is the most powerful sillage monster we own. Very hard to find, I understand.” March says: wow, that’s beautiful. I get a camphorous lapsang opening, then straight into a sweet-tea and other interesting bits (suede and musk?) This is reminding me of something, a men’s scent with tobacco? I can’t think of what and it’s driving me nuts.

Fendi Theorema (shimming body lotion) and Esprit d’Ete (EDT) – “Less complex and not as deep as our beloved Theorema, this summer version is a nice fragrance in its own right. Imagination Perfumery sells it for $16.99 while supplies last. The lotion puts down a subtle golden shimmer. I wonder if the plasticky quality of the scent comes from the tube it was packaged in.” March says: I see this online occasionally dirt cheap and never bought it. Smelling this summer version of Theorema I realized: Theorema ruined light, sweet orange blossom scents for me forever. The stunning beauty of Theorema’s dark, almost liquored, spicy candied orange peel has made almost every other orange scent seem pale and soapy. Here, let me list regular Theorema’s notes just so I can drool on my keyboard: nutmeg, pepper, orange, rosewood, rose, ylang-ylang, carnation, cinnamon, labdanum, patchouli, sandalwood, benzoin. There – are you drooling too? Anyway, I can’t find the notes for Esprit d’Ete, but it’s a much lighter, much less spicy, more linear orange scent — a good choice for someone who likes the slightly powdery, soapy floral sweetness of orange blossom rather than the sweet-tart acidity of the fruit. That regular Theorema body lotion, though – ugh. It smells like mildew to me.

Trussardi Jeans EDT “At first I liked this. Then I thought it was meh. I can’t decide.” March says: Wait … this is a men’s fragrance? It smells like heliotrope! Hang on … researching … oh, okay, this must be the women’s. Notes: green notes, fruits, almond, violet, tuberose, white lily, heliotrope, musk, vanilla and woods. I do think it’s pretty, a delicate powdery scent. It’s got a nice, light musk, and it’s a little bready, which I also like. Too much powder for my taste, but you powdery comfort-scent people might love this, and it’s a screaming deal online.

Scents I Cannot Hack and I’m Not Ashamed to Admit It

CB Musk Reinvention absolute “It asked me to send it to March.” March says: That’s because it knows it’s coming home to the Mother Ship. It can sit next to my own personal bottle of CB Musk Reinvention on the shelf, which I keep in its special airtight container designed to keep the XXXL skank from tainting everything around it. One of the very few scents I’ve seen people sniff and literally jerk their heads away from, like they’ve been bitten. Can I say I think it’s beautiful?

Ormonde Jayne Ormonde Woman “It will be more appreciated by you. I hate it violently.” Notes: Cardamom, coriander, grass oil, black hemlock, violet, jasmine absolute, vetiver, sandalwood, cedarwood, amber (and thank you Basenotes, I missed you!) March says: Wow. Oh, wow. Having tried this several times, I’d already typed a lead-in sentence about admiring OJ Woman’s masculine beauty while finding it unwearable – the only one of the OJ line I’ve not been able to love. Then I popped open the vial. You just never know, do you? Because all my murky Black Forest fears with this one, that primeval bit that creeps me out just enough that I can’t relax and enjoy it, seem to have vanished, replaced by something still dark but playful – a fairy tale involving an evil witch but with a happy ending. I still wouldn’t spray this thing on with abandon – on me it’s very strong, definitely a dabber. That resin/urine note which I’m guessing is hemlock can be (interestingly) modified by adding a dab of CB Black March, although it sounds a little sacrilegious to me, layering an OJ, frankly. It’s like touching up a masterpiece. I keep doing the first fifteen minutes over and over again, just for that rush of spicy violet. I wish the drydown were a tad sweeter, but nonetheless. I feel like I’ve finally gained admittance into some exclusive club.

Rochas Femme edp “I’m glad you like the reformulation more than I do.” March says: what, too much armpit? I have the vintage too, and it’s gorgeous, but a completely different scent, a woody chypre. The cumin in Femme was apparently added to try to achieve the same kind of shock level. I find the combination of cumin and the macerated peachy sweetness quite seductive.

Parfums de Nicolai Maharanih EDP “You’d think it would be my sort of thing. It isn’t.” March says: and I am surprised, because I would think it’s your sort of thing. I did a brief impression of Maharanih on my PdN post here, and can I say yet again what a woefully underappreciated line PdN is in my opinion, due in no small part to the fact that you almost never see them in a retail location? Clyde’s Pharmacy on Madison Ave. in NYC has some, but I have never seen them anywhere else outside the PdN store in London. Maharanih’s notes are orange essence and bitter orange peel, rose essence, carnation, cinnamon, patchouli, sandalwood, civet. Interestingly, this doesn’t even register to my nose as particularly orange-y – it’s a spicy pomander type of scent, unsweet, and that woody civet base combined with the florals is lovely. Some of the PdNs wear a bit sharp on me, but considering what an unusual flaw that is in current perfumery – not sweet enough! – I’m not going to complain about it. March the Maleficent decrees: everyone should love at least one PdN. I’m very fond of this and Balkis Light, which of course is impossible to find. Maria, I wonder if you like any of the others better? Have you tried Eau Exotique? New York? I know there are some PdN nuts on here!

Anyway, Maria, thanks very much for reminding me why I love perfume, and the people who love perfume.

cartridge wrappers: sullivanpress.com